Consequences: Remember The Nine

When my children were young, we had a simple phrase that became a cornerstone of our family values: “Remember the nine words.” Those nine words—"Think about it before you say or do it"—were a constant reminder to pause and consider the consequences of their actions and words. It was my way of instilling in them the understanding that everything they do or say carries weight and can lead to outcomes, both positive and negative.

The concept of consequences is straightforward: they are the direct results of our actions. Whether good or bad, consequences are inevitable. They function as a universal law, much like gravity. While gravity’s effects are immediate—what goes up must come down—the consequences of our decisions often unfold over time, sometimes in ways we least expect. This understanding became a guiding principle for my children as they grew.

In reflecting on consequences, I often think about the people whose lives take tragic turns because they fail to consider the outcomes of their actions. I used to watch crime shows like Snapped and programs on the ID Channel, but over time, I stopped. The negativity and pain depicted in those stories became too heavy. Yet, one recurring theme stood out to me during my years of watching: many criminals never seemed to think about consequences until it was far too late.

On these shows, the courtroom scenes are especially striking. In the moments when guilty verdicts are read, the reality of their actions finally dawns on the defendants. Their stoic expressions crumble into tears or anguish as the judge announces sentences of 20, 30, 40 years, or even life without parole. It’s a profound shift—from defiance or indifference to devastation—as they face the irreversible outcomes of their decisions. However, some individuals remain expressionless, unmoved even in the face of severe punishment. These are the ones who never thought—or perhaps never cared—about consequences.

But consequences are not always negative. Just as poor choices can lead to regret, good choices can bring joy and fulfillment. When we treat others with kindness and respect, we often experience the positive ripple effects of our actions. These moments of serendipity—unexpected blessings or fortunate events—are the rewards of living a life rooted in decency and thoughtfulness. The small, seemingly insignificant acts of kindness we extend to others often come back to us in meaningful ways, creating a cycle of positivity that enriches our lives.

Life offers countless opportunities to make choices that lead to positive consequences. Whether it's helping a neighbor, offering a kind word to a stranger, or simply listening to a friend in need, these actions not only brighten someone else’s day but also contribute to our own sense of purpose and fulfillment. Conversely, when we act out of anger, selfishness, or carelessness, we often find ourselves facing outcomes we’d rather avoid—strained relationships, missed opportunities, or feelings of regret.

Teaching my children to consider consequences wasn’t just about avoiding bad outcomes; it was about encouraging them to create good ones. I wanted them to understand that they hold the power to shape their own lives through the choices they make. By pausing to think before they act or speak, they could ensure their decisions aligned with their values and aspirations. This principle has guided them into adulthood and continues to serve as a reminder of the power of deliberate action.

In the end, consequences are life’s great equalizer. They remind us that our actions matter, that our words have weight, and that every decision we make shapes the course of our lives. Whether we find ourselves reaping the rewards of kindness or facing the fallout of poor choices, consequences teach us invaluable lessons about accountability, integrity, and the importance of thinking before we act.